Book Review: This Man by Jodi Ellen Malpas

This Man by Jodi jodi Ellen Malpas

THIS MAN
By Jodi Ellen Malpas

  • Series: This Man, Book 1
  • Genre: Contemporary Romance
  • Publisher: Forever
  • Published: October 22, 2013
  • ISBN-13: 978-1455578313

Young interior designer Ava O’Shea has no idea what awaits her at the Manor. A run-of-the-mill consultation with a stodgy country gent seems likely, but what Ava finds instead is Jesse Ward–a devastatingly handsome, utterly confident, pleasure-seeking playboy who knows no boundaries. Ava doesn’t want to be attracted to this man, and yet she can’t control the overwhelming desire that he stirs in her. She knows that her heart will never survive him and her instinct is telling her to run, but Jesse is not willing to let her go. He wants her and is determined to have her.

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A TACO REVIEW 

Hello my preciousness. This week I bring you This Man by Jodi Ellen Malpas. My coworker recommended this book about a month ago, she was going on and on about how I needed to read it. So she would have someone to gush over the characters with. Something we’ve all been through before. I finally gave in and read it. Damn you insistent coworker. Damn you!

You know how sometimes something makes you so angry you just have to rant? I apologize in advance because there is so much ranting.

In the fanfic community (shut up) we have something called PWP, which stands for either Plot What Plot or Porn Without Plot. This book is exactly that. Either of the acronyms, fit perfectly. There is no character development, no reader/character relationship, and the relationship between the main characters was iffy at best. Not to mention it’s an abusive relationship from the get go.

I didn’t particularly enjoy this book. I had to stop myself every few pages, put the book down and roll my eyes so hard I’m pretty sure I might have sprained something. I also had to fight the urge to lunge the book across the room and let out a mournful wail so loud it would impress Chewbacca. I didn’t do either because it’s a library book and Doña Mari (mommy dearest) would not appreciate the wail.

I want to punch Jesse Ward in the junk so hard his grandkids feel it. I want to punch Ava O’Shea in the chesticles just as hard. I’m all about equality, after all. The only true feelings these two hustled out of me were annoyance and contempt. Jesse, while he’s smoking hot like the sun and has a huge dong (Ava told me so), is a controlling son of a motherless goat that talks down to Ava and treats her like a child. Dude, do you want a girlfriend or a daughter? He stalks her and gets mad at her if she doesn’t answer the phone right away. Excuse me, she’s a 26 year old professional woman not your flippin’ 12 year old daughter. 30 missed calls while she’s showering. THIRTY! Ugh.

Ava O’Shea is an idiot. She’s such a doormat. She antagonizes Jesse in the most unnecessary ways. I understand trying to stick it to the man by rebelling against some BS “rule” he’s set, but she folds at the first sign of anger from Jesse. That’s not how rebelling works, you cow. Let’s not get into how flakey she is. One second she’s all “I want Jesse so much” and then she’s all like “No, I can’t fall into his arms like a floozy.” Yes, you can. You are a grown woman that can unashamedly bed a hot man as a rebound lay after your skeezeball ex-boyfriend cheated on you. It’s allowed. Just don’t do it at the place you work. No D is worth your career. None.

Kate is Ava’s BFF, she’s an instigator and a horrible BFF. Your job as BFF is to protect your friendship soulmate from dirtbags like Jesse Ward, not invite them up to your shared flat when you see that she’s clearly upset at him.

I give this book two Tacos on the Taco Scale of Awesome. Most of my animosity towards these characters are my own feelings on being talked to like an idiot: it’s not acceptable. I don’t care how hot or how rich you are, you do not talk to Taco like that. I would have given it one star but I kind of enjoyed the sex they were having. It was not amazing just enjoyable. And they’re Brits, so I liked some of the British slang they threw in there.

I’ve learned nothing about the backstories of these characters, I feel nothing for these characters (other than contempt as I said). I don’t see how they have fallen in love with one another when they’re still strangers. I can appreciate a relationship completely based on sex but that’s not what this is. Do not feed me this crap and tell me it’s a romance when all it is is abuse.

I don’t recommend this book unless you like over-controlling alpha males and spineless idiot female leads.

Until next time, Mon over and out. 

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